Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have a reading level above third grade

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Five dead in latest Israeli shootings of Gazans seeking aid, say local officials - Financial Times

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Did you swallow cum the first time you sucked a penis?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I actually pay taxes

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Did you ever receive genuine remarks from a medium regarding your deceased relative with information that the medium could never normally know?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I can count

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

China Considers Ordering Hundreds of Airbus Jets in Major Deal - Bloomberg.com

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

If You Have an Asus Router, You Need to Check If It's Been Hacked - Lifehacker

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

What is so great about Jiraiya?

I see through liars

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

What are some sex stories from your college days?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t buy bullshit

Would you date/marry a guy younger than you? If no, why not?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Six killed by Israeli gunfire near Gaza aid site, Hamas officials say - BBC

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Sweden’s Maja Stark wins U.S. Women’s Open for first major championship - NBC Sports

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

How to watch Apple’s WWDC 2025 keynote - TechCrunch

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I can read

I don’t cotton to rapists

Can Djokovic climb the mountain? - Roland Garros

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand how hurricane paths work

Former Player Gives Definitive Verdict on Knicks Firing Tom Thibodeau - Athlon Sports

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

While on the surface of the moon, why isn’t the Apollo 11 spacesuit inflated like a balloon from the 3.7 psi internal pressure?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”